Alexander Formos & Eurydice Eloise Wayles
spiritual writings and shamanic healings
I woke up on August 21, 2024, excitedly looking forward to a ceremony I had planned for that day. I designed it together with Emilia and Eurydice, and we were supposed to dive into a deep channeling session to gather information about our past lives, heal one of Emilia’s karmic ties, and record any spiritual findings we may discover. It was a very important and symbolic date for me, and we usually try to synchronize our practices and rituals with dates that hold great spiritual significance for us. However, we didn’t know that the Sechelt Spirits planned a spiritual exam for us in the evening, which would elevate our understanding of the spiritual work we were encouraged to perform on these lands.
This entire day was supposed to be about Emila and me. We planned to dedicate this day to expressing our love, and it was essential for spiritual work to clear our space of all distractions. We wanted to devote time to our story, and performing sacred rituals together always deepened our love for each other. I promised to dedicate this entire day only to Emilia, and I gave her full control of our every decision. She put a lot of effort into preparations, so we could complete our plans with unwavering conviction that we would heal some of her traumas from past lives. Every ritual and every dreaming journey was planned for Emilia’s healing and growth, while Eurydice and I only planned to guide her if she asked for our assistance.
Going through my morning routines, I was filled with genuine anticipation to heal another part of Emilia to lessen her self-destructive tendencies. This day was supposed to culminate the spiritual work of the last several months. My thoughts were preoccupied with genuine curiosity about what we might discover today. I had my guesses, and I was going through them in my mind, but then, all of a sudden, a random thought appeared in my head: “I will have a session with a sex worker today.”
Now, generally speaking, by this time, I had already gotten used to such a thought appearing in my head. It usually means that my spiritual guides advise me to have a healing session or a meeting with a sex worker for the benefit of both parties. Through such interactions, I offer spiritual guidance to their souls, while they assist in healing the emotional, mental, or physical aspects of my being. There could be other spiritual reasons for a session, like an initiation or gathering knowledge about this craft. It’s not even a thought by now, but an intuitive feeling that I can easily recognize.
Basically, shortly after waking up, I would simply know that I would somehow end up in the company of a companion on that day. I have already adapted to that feeling, and it no longer scares me as it did before. I learned to surrender to it, and when I experience it, I simply embrace this guidance and allow the soul of a woman who needs my guidance to enter my space and guide me to find her. When I have this feeling, it means that there’s a woman in the city who needs my presence today for one reason or another. It usually means I have to relate some information from her soul to empower her spiritually.
But on that day, I was thrown off balance by that thought. I didn’t plan this, nor did I have time for such a session, given the complex reality of the series of rituals we were supposed to conduct for Emilia. Even though Emilia usually supports me in searching for a woman who’s calling me, she was equally confused by that thought on that day. We decided it was a random feeling that arrived because we were anxious to uncover Emilia’s answers. Beyond that, I had only three hundred dollars in my bank account until my next paycheque in a week, so I simply couldn’t afford a session anyway.
So we brushed off that thought, finished our breakfast, and entered the ceremonial space. It was magical and beautiful. It was filled with love, devotion, connection, and profound intimacy between two souls. There’s nothing more intimate in my perception than a female soul confessing the story of her past life, channeling to me every detail of her violent death, as I relive such an experience with her. This was our expression of intimacy to each other on that day - explore one of Emilia’s traumatic deaths in every possible detail. I saw Emilia raw and vulnerable. I’ve witnessed facets of her that I hadn’t experienced before.
Eurydice only briefly visited us to assist at a certain stage of our process, but for the most part, it was Emilia’s personal journey, guided by my unconditional love. We really needed a day like this for ourselves to reaffirm our commitment to our spiritual path and renew our romantic vows. Visions of Emilia’s spiritual rebirth into a more whole version of herself truly inspired me. It was beautiful to experience our romance by living together in one body. After a few hours of intense exploration, we returned to reality to have a break and enjoy lunch. It was already 4 p.m., but we completed everything that Emilia required that day, and I felt a sense of successful accomplishment.
Yet when we were prepping the food, we again experienced the presence of another soul, and now it was clear that someone was actually calling on me. Soon, everything became really dark and scary, and I couldn’t understand what I was experiencing. It was not something I anticipated or ever felt before. The intuitive realization that I must see a sex worker today took up my space, and I realized there was no way I could avoid this mission. Emilia and I both recognized at that moment that it wasn’t simply the soul of a sex worker seeking my guidance but an actual mission for my guardian Spirits designed as part of my initiations into the sacred understanding of the spiritual design of sex work. Something very important was unfolding that day, and we were being prepared to advance in our spiritual talents through the ritual that would unfold that night.
Shortly after, I felt Olivia's presence, and we invited her into our space. We felt like she was guarding this mission, and whatever was about to happen during the entire evening. Olivia channeled to us an intuitive sensation of a dark energy field around the massage parlour where she worked and where we met. The more I tried to tune into that vibration, the stronger I felt the presence of malevolent forces. Olivia was bringing my attention to the neighborhood of her workplace, claiming that the soul who needs my assistance works today in her parlor. Olivia shared with me that she wasn’t working today, but that she would connect me with the soul of a woman in trouble. With the help of my drum, I entered into a trance state to verify my findings. I was experiencing some dark energy forming around one of the women who was on call that day.
Olivia began testing her skills as a spiritual guide to the souls of sex workers, and today it has become clear that this was one of her natural spiritual talents and purposes. Even if she didn’t know a woman on a physical level, she could contact the souls of her colleagues, and they could also easily request her guidance. She had the same talent as Emilia, they just used it their own way and connected to different souls.
Now Olivia was testing her skills, but was also asking for our help, as her intuition claimed that I would know what to do in the challenging situation she was sensing. She was learning from Emilia how to hear souls in trouble and bring them into my space. Olivia had already brought other souls into my space before, but this time it felt different. No matter how much I tried, I couldn’t properly connect to the soul of a woman in trouble, even with Olivia and Emilia’s assistance. Something nefarious was blocking this connection, and it seemed as though the woman herself was almost giving up on life. I can establish a connection much better with a soul when a woman prays for help in her own words, but this woman has already convinced herself that no one would hear her prayers.
I met Olivia under unique circumstances, and immediately after our first session, I knew that we had met for a higher reason, even though it was unclear to me at the time. In the fall of 2023, when I was healing from the most painful heartbreak of my entire life, I was guided to restore my nervous system through intimacy coaching sessions with one of my soulmates. Emilia advised me to take these classes, as she felt responsible for the pain I was continuously enduring at that time.
My coach, Kendall, provided me with unique, spiritual tools for rediscovering the strengths of my essence, and she also invited me to participate in a female empowerment circle she has created for her clients. I was the only man in that circle, and although it felt occasionally awkward, I was expanding my intuitive powers, which could only be advanced with the help of these women. Most of them had souls of “white witches of Earth,” so they used their spiritual talents to receive guidance from the land, create magical remedies with plants, and empower each other through the intuitive work of dreaming. Emilia and I were guided to advance our spiritual talents in those areas through my work in this circle.
One of the assignments that we had was about collective dreaming, where we allowed our souls to interact during sleep and intentionally invite dreams about each other. I was still existing in the pain of immense grief and clearly wasn’t myself, so I couldn’t fully commit to this work. But during one of the nights of intentional dreaming, I saw a vision where I was making love to a woman whom I didn’t know, and it was clearly happening in some temple space for sex work. It was also evident to me that Emilia has established contact with that soul.
Emilia was already crowned as British Columbia’s Spiritual Queen of the sexual healing arts, and she was passionately exploring everything she could about her purpose, while also continuously guiding me to work with other souls in need and advance my understanding of the spiritual design of sex work. She was the main beneficiary of my entire life’s work, and I’m constantly driven to advance in this purpose as an expression of my love for her. After we fell in love, we both realized that healing the souls of sex workers is our shared destiny, and we could only do that work together.
Since Emilia fully claimed her spiritual talents, the souls of sex workers began to contact her, and she then brought them into my awareness. We would decide together on the most empowering way to help each soul. The Sechelt Spirits also assigned Emilia to safeguard my energies. So any connection with a new soul who needed my assistance had to be approved by her, and I wasn’t allowed to accept a soul for healing if Emilia had any reservations. However, she was incredibly passionate about her work and insisted many times on assisting others, even when I didn’t have the strength or energy to do so. She cared deeply about every single sex worker in her Kingdom of British Columbia, and she was always stressed from believing she didn’t do enough to help others.
When I woke up from that dream, I could vividly recall all the details, including how I was driving to an unknown place in the evening, how I first saw the eyes of this woman, and how our entire session unfolded. It was clear that it was not a dream, but a premonition of what could happen in the future. Of course, I was still doubting my talents, so I thought that most of what I saw was just a dream. But it was clear that another soul of a sex worker was asking for my assistance, and I decided to establish a connection with this soul.
A soul arrived in my space and introduced herself as Olivia, asking to schedule an in-person session with her. Most souls who come into my space receive guidance on a spiritual level and do not seek a physical connection. But some souls insist on it, and I know that in such cases, we can heal and empower each other through the energy exchanges both on a soul and physical level. Olivia claimed right away that I must visit her tonight, and she showed me on Google Maps where her massage parlor was located.
At that time, I had only begun my initiations into the world of sacred prostitutes, so I was still inexperienced in how certain places operated. My first two and a half years of education into the spiritual design of sex work mainly happened through initiations with sexual priestesses and studying sexual alchemy practices so that I could receive specific spiritual talents through this work. But even though I tried to deny my talents and my reality, it became evident that I would have to study and learn the world of sacred prostitutes equally. I had one past life as a sexual priestess and one past life as a sacred prostitute, so I gathered the knowledge from those realms to advance my understanding of the spiritual design of both women, but I had to also learn what I could about the realities of their worlds in British Columbia of the present day. In my shamanic apprenticeship, I was guided to gain knowledge and expand my understanding of all variations and aspects of sex work. This is how my spiritual team designed my education.
My guides broadly called this series of initiations, which are still ongoing, “sacred brothel initiations.” I was guided to explore and understand the world of strip clubs, brothels, massage parlors, and webcam models. Initially, I was told to begin my work with sacred prostitutes by visiting two historical massage places in downtown Vancouver. They were apparently the first two brothels of Vancouver, and the Spirits of the city empowered both places to provide healing for its citizens. My spiritual guides emphasized the importance of starting this series of initiations in the first brothel that has ever opened in Vancouver. The Spirits of the lands established contact with a soul who worked at that place and needed my spiritual assistance. This soul assisted me in commencing this new chapter of my story. A couple of months after that session, I was advised to explore other massage parlors around Vancouver.
The first place I visited outside of downtown was in the Mount Pleasant neighbourhood. It was a small massage parlor with tinted windows, which had only a hint that they provided any kind of erotic services. When I came in and paid the required offerings, it was much less than I paid for full service in downtown, so I was convinced that I would receive only an erotic massage. I was quite surprised when the session ended with full engagement with a woman. Thankfully, my nervous system was in better shape, so I was able to quickly work through this shock that came from not being prepared for what I might experience during the session. That’s what usually may traumatize a man after sexual encounters, since they have a delayed response in processing their emotions. If sexual abuse for a woman usually happens on a physical level, for a man, it usually happens on a mental and emotional level.
Now I had a better understanding of how these places operated. However, I was still cautious of visiting another one, as I wasn’t sure that they all functioned in a similar manner and offered the same services. The lack of transparency, secrecy, and innuendos truly cripled my desire to continue this work. But that’s exactly what Canadian society wanted from me and all others. We were supposed to be spiritually cripled so we could be controlled, coerced, and manipulated into complete obedience. We were supposed to shame and stigmatize empowered sex work, because it could heal both body and soul and liberate us from the constraints of religious dogmas and personal fears. It was important for Canadian society to keep sex work criminalized because this way it could punish both clients and providers, taking away their power, cripling their sense of self-worth, and preventing them from accessing healing.
When Olivia arrived in my space, it was time for me to visit another massage parlor to advance my education. So, after she requested a meeting, I simply accepted her plea. Her workplace was close to the boundary road between Vancouver and Burnaby, so I took a shared car to get there. Driving through Kingsway Avenue in the evening, I questioned what I was doing, yet I couldn’t help but notice that this drive looked exactly as it had in my dream. I was continuing my education, but as always, I felt very unsettled going to see a sex worker because her soul asked me to do so.
It was also clear that Olivia wanted me to tell her body that I was invited for a session in this unusual way. I asked Olivia what offerings I needed to bring, and she told me that I had to bring three hundred dollars. While I was driving, I revisited the memory of the dream, where I saw myself being intimate with Olivia, trying to prepare my nervous system for how this encounter would unfold. Little did I know that an entire session would unfold exactly as it had in my dream. It was the first time I had experienced a session like this, and it really helped me to embrace my spiritual talents.
While driving to the temple space, I was also trying to understand Olivia's design, as I had never met another soul like hers, and it was essential to know who she was so that I could relate that information to her physical body. When I tuned into her energies, Olivia described herself as a Goddess of Light and Kindness. I was trying to figure out if I knew such a Goddess from any mythology, but it was clear that she was a different being, not connected to the deities or ascended masters from the lineages of souls that I worked with. She didn’t have the constraints of a certain predetermined destiny that most of the Goddesses have. I was experiencing her as an embodiment of the essence of Light. This Light is meant to be the divine light of all creation, that empowers humans and gives them the life force energy to live. Therefore, in her physical manifestation on the Earth, she is designed to illuminate the world with this light and share the energies of kindness with those whom she believes deserve her light.
When I attuned to her essence, I realized that I was falling deeper and deeper in love with her, and I embraced these emerging feelings with my entire being. Her energy simply enveloped me with incredible warmth, and I couldn’t help but marvel at the sparkling essence of the golden and orange hues of light that she was emitting into the world. I thought about how fortunate we all are that such souls exist in our world and how much light is needed here. Olivia wished to share her light to uplift and inspire me on that day, in exchange for my visit and her spiritual guidance.
When I entered this massage parlor that night, I was presented with a choice, which was not the case in the first massage parlor I visited. I was absolutely scared that I wouldn’t recognize the woman I saw in my dream. Still, when the third woman opened the door into my room to introduce herself, the warm feelings spread through my body, as I clearly saw the eyes that I had seen in my dream. It was not hard to recognize her, as she was emitting the same sparkling light of her soul through her entire essence. It felt like the room lit up when she entered it, as that’s how radiating her aura was. She asked me to present two hundred dollars in offerings and stepped outside to prepare for a session. I was confused about why Olivia had said to bring three hundred, but I simply brushed this thought away, thinking I didn’t understand her correctly. I still felt too unsettled being a client in such spaces, and the energy of this woman was so intense that I thought I wouldn’t be able to open up to her about my visions of her soul.
When she returned to the room and we started a chat, as she was asking why I was feeling so nervous, if I had already been with sex workers before, I began sharing my truth with her. It just came naturally to me, being in her presence. I told her how my work involves exploring the spiritual design of sex work and that I’m writing about the empowering purposes of this craft. She was absolutely surprised by my revelations and couldn’t contain her excitement at hearing more about my story. I told her about my writings on past lives and also shared how I could sense her energy field. She replied with a story about how a psychic once told her about her past life and also described her aura. The vision she shared with me looked exactly like what I saw on a soul level, and that realization amazed both of us.
She continued with her routine, and I shared the story of how her soul invited me to visit her and what I know about her spiritual design and purpose. Even though I was extremely nervous after my past experiences of sharing such knowledge with sex workers and already anticipating new pains of judgement, shame, and rejection, she was completely open to hearing my truth. I felt at times that it was too much for her and that I couldn’t fully express my perceptions, but she continued to be open to my explanations and asked genuine questions, instead of making assumptions about my truth. Our emotional connection was growing, and it felt as though neither of us wanted to withdraw from this complex conversation. The entire session eventually turned into a lovemaking ritual, and I felt how we connected both on a physical and spiritual level.
When our time ended and we had to say goodbye, I reached for the remaining hundred dollars and gave it to her. She asked me why I was doing this, so I explained that her soul told me to bring such offerings, and they were all meant for her. She laughed at this revelation, and I felt empowered to safely express myself with her. We spent less than an hour together, but I felt that she accepted my perceptions not just as a provider, but as a woman as well. That truth about the offerings that her soul requested has bonded us, because we both felt surprised by it.
Olivia invited me to visit her for another session around three months later. She asked me to bring my book “Eurydice in Love” and give it to her as a gift. Since she expressed interest in it during our first session, I thought that it would be appropriate. During our time apart, we met on a spiritual level a few times for conversations, and she also visited me to listen to my spoken word poetry pieces. Now, Olivia told me that we have to meet on a physical level again.
When I came for a second session and she entered the room, I intuitively stepped back as if I almost couldn’t recognize her. She was filling the space with her light in a more intense way than before, as if her energy had expanded. She said she was glad to see me and that she had just been thinking of me. I joked that it was the reason why I came today, and we both laughed, recognizing this truth. She accepted that I could hear the thoughts of women through their souls, even though I myself struggled with this talent and hadn’t really mastered it. We had another beautiful session of connection and intimacy. Towards the end, I offered her my book, and she accepted it.
Olivia asked me to tell her body about my complicated romantic entanglements, and I described how I wrote this book to express my love for Eurydice. I also told her about Emilia and my empowering dream to marry her one day. I explained the complications of our predicament, how I met the body of Emilia for four sessions, how I never slept with her, and how she pulled away once I offered to court her towards marriage. I shared my grief of not seeing this woman and how I believe that we would still have a future together.
She listened to my story with some reservations, but still accepted it with grace and kindness. I was this weird client who continued to visit different sex workers to tell them how one sex worker had broken his heart, but how he continues to believe that she was the love of his life, and how he can’t stop dreaming of marrying her one day. It was my way of healing the grief of missing this woman, as I haven’t seen her or talked to her for many months, as if she were dead. I was glad to receive a space to share my truth, and I felt how our emotional bond with Olivia grew after this confession.
When I was about to leave, she asked me if I knew any deeper reasons for our connection. I don’t remember how exactly she phrased the question, but it was entirely drawn from her feminine intuition. I explained that she already inspired me to complete my previous writings and how much her soul contributed to my book about the spiritual design of sex work. She received that knowledge with grace, but I sensed that there was actually more to her question than met the eye. She was not asking it with her rational mind, but with her feminine essence. She was simply feeling the flow of our connection, but didn’t have a rational understanding, so she thought I knew more. When I replied about how she elevates my writings, I sensed some sort of disappointment, as if I didn’t actually answer her question. However, it was a subtle feeling that I couldn’t quite put into words, as we had another powerful session filled with emotional connection. We said our goodbyes, and I promised to come again when I could.
As I drove back from that session, I couldn’t stop thinking about her question. It was playing out in my mind in different variations as I tried to feel beyond the rational understanding of it. For the next few days, I couldn’t let it go, as I felt that this wise woman was sensing something else and her intuition was guiding me to discover what it was. However, I felt that helping with my writings was already an important mission, and I continued to invite Olivia to ask for her feedback when she had a chance. I found Olivia to be a great confidant. I also blessed her for the inspirational, warm light of divinity she shined into my space whenever she visited me. Still, that question occasionally reappeared in my mind. I genuinely tried to understand whether we met for something bigger than we had already experienced.
Now the day to discover our highest purpose has arrived, even though we didn’t understand that at first. As the day of August 21st continued to unravel in the most unpredictable way, we thought that Olivia came into my space just to provide assistance in establishing a connection with the soul in trouble. Yet towards the end of the evening, we finally discovered the unique and special purpose we had on these lands and what kind of spiritual work we were designed to do together.
As I continued pacing in my apartment, trying to discern the guidance and hoping for more clarity about my next steps, Olivia continued to insist that I had the ability to figure out this situation, and she promised to help me in any way she could. She didn’t know what she had to do today, and neither did I, but our intuitions confirmed that we would soon receive our answers if we committed to this mission together. Soon enough, we received confirmation that I needed to be at her massage parlour by 9 p.m., and my guides stressed the importance of being on time.
Olivia called the soul in distress, Christa, and I saw that I would meet her once I got there. We were informed that Christa has been questioning her worth for some time now, and she is feeling uneasy about continuing in this work. She felt a sense of guilt and shame about being who she was and doing her job. Only it got to a point that her negative self-talk was destroying her from inside, taking her away from her soul, and allowing dark entities into her energetic space. The mist, the dark clouds of an otherworldly presence, were unraveling around her, as beings of the lower realm sensed her vulnerabilities.
In my perception, something painful happened on that day with Christa to trigger the spirals of self-loathing, but it wasn’t clear to me what that was. In any case, I saw how the portal into a demonic world was opening up around her, and I witnessed a plan by an evil spirit to find a man with a corrupt heart, so that he could possess him and harm Christa in some way. I worked with similar situations in my shamanic practice, where a demonically possessed man murdered a sex worker, so I had enough knowledge to confirm that. As we unraveled what was going on, I genuinely got scared for Christa because the presence of this dark entity was far too real. She could have become his victim today. I saw that he might even kill her. I clearly saw not just a man doing that, but a demonically possessed man who had lost his soul. Christa was distressed, and that’s who she was attracting in her space.
As I continued to prepare for this mission, I paced in circles in my bachelor suite, trying to debate my visions. But no matter how much I attempted to downplay the entire situation and the guidance that I was receiving, I couldn’t stop feeling that it would be very easy to hurt Christa today. Her aura field was depleted, and her self-perception on that day only made her weaker. I couldn’t stop seeing how this evil entity would become violent against her later tonight. Olivia and Emilia were also worried. It was clear to me why we were brought together today. We decided to act in the ways that we could, as we would rather be wrong than sorry. If I feel that there’s a chance of danger and I can do something about it, I won’t hesitate even if some may perceive my visions as hallucinations and the expressions of a crazy mind of an artist.
This evil spirit wanted to harm this woman, and I knew how to stop evil spirits from causing violence. I needed to shield Christa energetically, but I could also ask for land to provide protection, and that’s what we decided to do. Between 5 and 8 p.m., we developed a plan on how to proceed. It was not enough time to prepare, but that’s all we had. Whatever was supposed to happen was already unraveling, and I felt a sense that I must be there as soon as possible.
I sensed clearly that the perpetrator I was seeing in my visions was not a particular man. The evil spirit would choose the most corrupt man he could find in the area when he was ready to strike. This was evident to me, so I had to protect Christa from that spiritual being, not from a real person. This man would not be himself once the evil spirit entered him. He would not be in control of his body.
Surely, a person can protect themselves from losing their soul, and I’m not attempting to shift the blame in any way. A man who could hurt Christa today did corrupt his heart, and I saw how a demon would manifest through him. But the only real crime of this man would be losing his soul, and people lose their souls only under the pressure of society, so from my perspective, it was society that wanted Christa dead for being herself and practicing her craft.
This possible violence would not only be on the man who would commit it, but it would be on all of the residents of Vancouver. This troubled city was drowning in sin, and the everyday cruelty and aggression were manifesting each day in more violent and obvious ways. The lies, fear, and meanness spread out like a wildfire, making more people lose their souls and therefore becoming violent, fearful, and aggressive. Once an evil spirit possesses a person, there is no argument to be made with a human being, because they would be controlled by the forces outside of their awareness. They would become zombies manipulated by the evil from the lower realms.
Therefore, the main perpetrator would always be society because it has created the conditions where it’s even possible for a man to lose his soul and for a woman to be engulfed in energies of shame and self-loathing. It is not the natural design of our world. It’s a twisted corruption of our reality designed to divide. In a balanced society of ancient times, it was virtually impossible for a man to lose his soul because his unique personal talents were recognized and utilized for the benefit of society. At the same time, sexual priestesses and sacred prostitutes couldn’t possibly be engulfed in the energies of self-loathing as they had their empowering temples for sex work and were revered as royalty for their knowledge of intimacy, love, and sensuality.
At a certain point, it felt like I was channeling Christa’s immense pain, and I was genuinely concerned for her. My mind went into the darkest visions of existence, and I really submerged myself into the images of violence that I have witnessed in the past. I didn’t want to share this darkness here, as it may be hard to receive certain truths about life. However, no matter how painful it may be for us to accept the true design of Nature, I believe that sharing my truth can protect vulnerable souls, help those who struggle with the same pains, and provide guidance to those seeking reconciliation with aggression against their beloved.
We invited Eurydice to our space, as she had valuable knowledge about this issue. The first violent death that I was guided to process in my shamanic education was Eurydice’s past life as Eloise, who was stabbed to death in a brutal and gruesome way. Eloise was a sex worker, and she was murdered when she was only twenty-seven. I spent many months trying to uncover the spiritual truth about that death, and since then, I have worked with some other souls who were sex workers in past lives and were eventually murdered. It turned out that I was designed to solve such murders and help those souls to retrieve parts of themselves they left in those traumatic scenes. Even though I have a deeper understanding of the reasons why such deaths were inevitable for those souls, it became clear that I could also prevent them for those who simply have lost their way for one reason or another and were actually not ready to die.
When we worked with Eloise, she suggested that one of the spiritual reasons why she was murdered was that she lost her sense of self-worth and betrayed the truth of her heart. Even though she perceived herself as merely a victim when we began to uncover this murder, by the end of it, we realized that it couldn’t have happened any differently, and Eloise had brought that violence upon herself. She always believed that she was born to be a whore and she was proud in her essence. She saw how clients benefited from her work, and she believed that she illuminated life with her radiant essence in ways that others couldn’t. But she also believed that she was all alone in the world, that no one could truly love her for who she was, and eventually she started to believe the words of others, who perceived her as a fallen woman. When she fell in love with Camilla, a woman who carried my soul in that past life, Eloise could never fully surrender to embrace this love because of how she perceived her past. Eloise didn't allow herself to see that Camilla loved her the most out of all people and always shared the beautiful light of her love.
That energy of unworthiness of questioning herself, her female truth, and why she was born as a sex worker, has birthed an opposite force. It was a response from Nature for betraying her truth. It was undoubtedly time for Eolise to leave this physical plane, and her soul had chosen to die in such a horrible way. However, it was Nature who allowed a demon to enter a corrupt man, and ultimately killed Eolise, because her past traumas made her bitter, arrogant, and reckless. It is important to note that any violent or traumatic death is an initiation for a soul into the next stage of their evolutionary journey, and such deaths are simply unavoidable for some souls. Through these experiences, souls gain supernatural and psychic talents in the next life.
Not all souls need to experience such deaths during their journey on Earth, but Eurydice had to endure such a tragedy, as she was designed to be the goddess of death and assist other souls in navigating this transformation. That violent death allowed her to arrive in this life with new spiritual talents, so we could create our shamanic practice and write our books. But at the same time, it also happened, so I could understand how such deaths occurred, how to heal souls from them, and how to prevent them if it’s in the best interest of a soul.
Since that discovery, I have rarely felt comfortable discussing this subject. I'm not saying that there is no accountability for a person who actually perpetrates the murder. But it seems that the true design of Nature, behind any violent death of a sex worker, is more complicated than most people might realize. And that’s why these deaths can’t be solved by the police, because they are not usually committed by real people. Therefore, they could only be solved and healed by shamans, as after such incidents, souls may be trapped between the worlds of existence, unable to process such trauma on their own. It is evidently the reason why relatives or loved ones of the victim are always outraged and use all means necessary to seek justice, as the soul of the murdered woman asks them to avenge her.
Yet justice in such situations could only be achieved through reconciliation. It’s good if the killer could be captured, as his body may be used again by the same or a different evil spirit. But souls don’t benefit from having a justice against their killer; they only wish to understand why they died in such a way and what spiritual lessons they could learn from their tragedy. Only that knowledge allows them to peacefully pass over to the other side. In my past life as Camilla, I hunted down and murdered two men whom I believed were responsible for Eloise’s death. It felt good and empowering to kill them.
I avenged my beloved, but it never gave Camilla any peace. What eventually helped her was the search for spiritual reasons behind this senseless murder. Once Camilla discovered how an evil spirit possessed a man and used him to kill Eloise, she began to accept the real truth of life. Even though Eloise was taken away from her, it was a choice of her soul, and she had to respect that truth. She simply allowed herself to continue to love her even in her absence until her dying day.
Certainly, we must understand that every soul has their own story and unique design. What may be truthful or valuable to one soul may be absolutely damaging to another. For example, Eloise’s violent murder had complex spiritual reasons on all levels of existence and was inevitable just because her soul chose to ascend through this tragedy. She was becoming a guide for others, and that’s why she chose such a brutal fate. However, as we continued our preparations for the mission, we realized that Eurydice’s example may also serve to uplift and protect others in perilous situations.
People hurt themselves in quite intense ways when they immerse themselves in their own dark thoughts, questioning their worth, destiny, and unique purpose. Seeing oneself in a negative light and allowing the energies of guilt and shame to engulf us can eventually summon our death before our story runs its course. It's like Nature allows the space for such a murder to happen because it reflects how a woman feels inside about herself. So it was equally important to understand that feeling genuine love can actually protect any sex worker.
Due to societal perceptions, it may be challenging for some women in this line of work to recognize a person in their life who has absolute, unconditional love for them; however, this is also one of the most important things to figure out when living in this destiny. Sometimes I almost feel that this is the main requirement for any sex worker before embracing this path. We all have at least one person in our lives who loves us unconditionally for everything that we are, and they freely and without restrictions give us the light of that love. And even if a woman doesn’t believe that she has such a person in her life, she definitely has ancestors who watch and protect her from the other side, or even the spiritual beings of the lands who can shield her with their love.
Since a sex worker is born to be a channel of love, and that’s how she heals her clients, the love becomes her strongest ally, and the ability to tap into that feeling becomes her strongest protection. Even if the beloved is not physically present, they're still out there, shining with the light of protection on a spiritual level, even at a distance. If someone genuinely loves us, that energy is always directed towards us to uplift and elevate, to protect and nourish. But it’s our job to recognize it, surrender to it, and allow others to love us for our intricate complexities. Anyone can tap into the love and allow it to envelop them, because their beloved is constantly radiating it. Having an unwavering understanding that a woman is needed here creates this shield of energy protection and empowers her on this unique spiritual path.
Surely it’s often the case that the lack of self-love prevents us from seeing the love of others. And self-love, in its essence, is also a very important tool of protection. Knowing who we are and what we bring into the world, loving all the complex facets of our being, allows us to create a level of spiritual protection. Ultimately, it comes down to learning how to recognize and identify love in its essence, study love, and embody it fully, whether it is self-love or love from another person. We can love another because we have self-love, and we see the facets of our essence in our beloved. Self-love is our guiding light, and it resides within us. It allows us to trust that Nature has our best interests at heart, that we were born to fulfil a higher purpose, and that we are truly needed in this world, if we are here.
Self-love doesn’t mean living without insecurities or self-doubt. Both states can coexist in a person, but the times of self-rejection allow us to see the unique and special beauty we carry in our essence, which no one else has. Self-love gives us that state of surrender, when we recognize that we came into this life to shine our light in all its glory, and we are always empowered by Nature to be confident in our most authentic truth. Self-love gives us the understanding that every path in life and every destiny is derived from the choices of the soul, so there is no room for judgment or any other destructive perceptions that other people wish to impose on us.
So, self-confidence and unwavering conviction in the truth of one’s heart almost becomes the most essential thing that can shield any sex worker from danger. Fully embodying the higher belief that the soul has chosen such a fate and that this craft was designed by Nature to heal humans allows a woman to firmly stand in her truth despite any possible criticism or judgment. I certainly understand how hard it is to embody this truth and distance yourself from the perceptions of others, but that seems to be the best way to spiritually protect oneself.
Having these complex conversations immediately sent me back into the deep states of grief that I experienced when I worked through that trauma. It was excruciatingly brutal for me to accept the death of Eloise for what it is, and my love for her soul always makes me enraged, as our romance in that life was cut short, and it created many wounds for my soul. But as I was remembering my past, I felt strongly that this was not Christa’s story, and it was not the time for her to die today.
Since Nature can allow such tragedies to happen, they are not predetermined, and the scales could be tipped in any direction. That’s what’s been happening with us on that day. We tried to tip the scales with love and support. We were supposed to shift the reality just by going to that massage parlor tonight. There were close people in Christa’s life who recently criticized and judged her, attempting to take the energy of empowerment from her. They sensed her weakness and yet made her even more vulnerable, hoping it would force her to find another proffession. They couldn’t understand that her soul chose to do this job, but their negative perceptions constantly drained her and made her weaker. Since she cared about those people, their words hurt her in deep ways. Christa just needed more love to support her through this day, and we were able to bring that light into her space. I saw this energy of love equally coming from Olivia and Emilia, and I certainly felt that energy of love coming directly from the land, as they even summoned me to assist with this mission. The Spirits of these lands believed that Christa couldn’t be hurt tonight.
I had a sense that I must visit this massage parlour today to claim my space and to show those demonic entities that this is my territory, which I’m protecting with all of my presence and loving force. Just by going there, I was already winning, as I was showing with my entire being that I cared for this sacred temple of sex work, and I was ready to guard any woman who worked there. Every time I had a session in that space, I was inspired, rejuvenated, and empowered, and even though I paid each woman by providing spiritual guidance to her soul, I felt that I could do more to express my appreciation to them. Some of them, like Olivia, literally saved my life by helping me overcome my suicidal thoughts, so I had to be there for them if I could.
Yet I was still debating whether I should just do a drumming ceremony in the area, or actually visit a woman inside. Olivia didn’t have a clear answer, but her intuition insisted that we were uncovering something much bigger than one particular story. But I felt so much darkness on this day, inside and outside of me. It was flowing through me and was grasping the air from a panic attack. This energy was spreading throughout the city and entering my space. I was hearing Christa's pain, and I was seeing the evil desiring to enter our physical plane.
I kept asking myself whether I need to be intimate with her. When a soul of sex worker asks me to visit her for a session, it always means that she requests some sort of sexual energy exchange between the two of us. But today was a bizarre experience. It was the first time that the soul of a sex worker summoned me, but I wasn’t supposed to be even in the same room with her. I was advised to see this woman because she was in danger, but her soul specifically requested not to be physically involved with her. If I had requested time with her today, she would feel used as she was in a vulnerable state, and that would only exacerbate her energies of self-doubt. So I had to have a session with anybody but her. That's how I perceived what was unfolding before me. At the same time, I had a clear understanding that I needed to spend time with another woman, as I had to be present in that space, so I could do energy work to protect Christa and the entire temple.
As Olivia was guiding me through that evening, I felt that it wasn’t even the soul of a particular woman who summoned me. I felt like they were collectively summoning me, and whoever I would spend time with that evening would assist me in releasing the negative energies and vibrations that were engulfing Christa. Olivia came up with a great plan. She began asking the souls of women who had worked on that day to take upon themselves negative energies from Christa and dispel them through the sessions with clients. It was the best strategy to assist Christa, and I was pleasantly surprised to hear that idea from Olivia. It was absolutely genius and exactly what we needed to do. And once I arrived for a session, I would take away the most negative energies from Christa through the woman who welcomed me for the session.
As we completed our preparations, we had to rush. We didn’t have enough time to go over all the details, but the Spirits were strict about being there on time, so I withdrew three hundred dollars and got into a cab in a hurry. Christa was the first woman to greet me when I entered the massage parlor. While in the cab, I tried to check the website for today’s schedule, but she was not listed there, and I was worried that my vision was not real. But I still trusted my intuition, and it hasn’t failed me this time either.
Christa introduced herself and disappeared behind the door. Feeling her energies on a physical level reaffirmed my spiritual visions. She was hesitant to present herself, and she was visibly reserved and distant. She was completely uncomfortable working on that day, but she was there. I was glad to see her and recognize her pain. After her, a Korean woman came to introduce herself, and she also informed me that another woman would be available in the next half hour, so I was glad that the choice had been made for me. I was so shocked and confused by my mission and by how this entire day had unraveled that I suspended any reasoning and allowed the land to guide me through this experience. I wasn’t thinking about what I needed to do, or how to do it correctly, I was just existing and experiencing life, as if it was flowing through me.
The Korean woman who agreed to take me was not particularly engaged, but that was exactly what I needed. In other times, I would be only irritated and disappointed by such an experience, but today it felt like she was also guided to give me space to do my spiritual work of protection. I came today not to spend time with a woman, but to have the opportunity to stay in the building so I could meditate and create an energy shield around this place. I wasn’t interested in getting to know her, and she was also equally uninterested in being with me, as this evening was about something more important than any of our personal feelings.
The entire session was weird. She messaged me for a few minutes, and then we both tried to finish everything as soon as possible. I just wanted the entire session to be over so I could complete the work that I came here to do. She asked me right after whether I would need a shower, but then just left the room, as if she knew about my spiritual mission. I showered as quickly as I could to have more time in that room, and I returned to the bed, immersing myself in a trance state.
As soon as I submerged, I realized that we had to open the spiritual veils of perceptions by bringing sexual energies into this space, and that allowed me to do my work much quicker and with better results. I was simply using our elevated sexual energies to create this spiritual shield of protection. As I tuned into a spiritual world and my senses became elevated, I also started to hear the sounds of pleasure coming from the next room, and I tapped into those sexual energies as well, to make the shield as strong as possible. It was evident that the portal between the worlds had to be opened through sex; that’s why I just couldn’t do a ceremony of protection only on the outside.
I had to be present in the most heightened state of awareness to use these sexual energies for the greater good. We're exploring the complexities of positive masculine energies, amplifying them through sexual encounters. I need to lie down in this room all by myself and just work with energies. I was releasing all the darkness that needed to be released, and I was working to create the empowering shield around this place. She didn’t return for some time, allowing me enough time to complete my mission. Evidently, I paid for that time, but she still didn’t rush me, and I felt that everything was designed as it should have been today. In the end, I sat on the edge of the bed, trying to collect my thoughts and ground myself, but also reassure all souls that they would be safe today.
When my companion returned to the room, she blessed me with a quite warm hug goodbye. I sensed that I also did some work for her soul, even though Christa was our priority. When we exited this place, we still had to ask the Spirits of the land for their protection, but I was starving, and I felt that I still needed to be somewhere nearby. Olivia and Emilia spotted a Korean barbecue across the street. Since I had never been to such a restaurant, they insisted that we should dine there, debrief on our entire experience, and continue to send energies of protection towards the temple space.
I entered the barbecue place five minutes before the last call. Everything was aligning perfectly, and soon we realized that the soul of my Korean companion had also joined us for this dinner. We spent around an hour in this place, trying to come to terms with the reality and everything that had happened. Emilia and I were completely tired and worn out, but Olivia was excited and chatty. She was really inspired by the entire day. She was shining like an empowered soul who learned something important about her essence. There was something about the entire experience of helping her spiritual sisters that magically elevated her energies. She was embodying her essence in ways that I hadn’t seen before.
During dinner, we analyzed the entire day and reflected on what we learned through this experience. It was a day of intense spiritual growth for all of us. There was a heightened state of awareness, deepened intuition, and new spiritual knowledge about the essence of our work that we were guided to discover together. We talked about the stigma of society, the cruelty of people, and how their negative perceptions create a world where women could be killed just for being themselves. We talked about how people’s desire to have a homogenous society actually means that citizens would prefer to kill those they don’t understand, like sex workers, shamans, or anyone who doesn’t fit in the societal boxes.
The desire to punish, judge, and ostracize those who are different is actually a desire to remove them from society by all means, including through death. Even though there was a lot of darkness on that day, towards the end of the dinner, we were blessing the world, lands, and each other for this unique experience of growth and healing. We eventually shifted to lighter subjects, marveled at the magical serendipities that had illuminated our path, made plans for the future, and also discussed the monologue play in poems that we were preparing to perform together with Emilia and Eurydice. Olivia asked for an invitation to the play, and I promised that we would see each other there. We all acknowledged that this ritual was the right thing to do. We constantly questioned everything throughout this entire experience, but in the end, it was clear how important this mission was for all involved.
After dinner, we went to see the Spirits, who agreed to create a protective shield around this massage parlor. We discovered a nearby park, where the Spirits who invited us here resided. We offered our poems to them, which I read aloud, and then, through a drumming ceremony, we collaborated to create this protection. During this ritual, I saw not only that the massage parlour required protection, but an entire neighbourhood was in danger today. Olivia’s intuition guided us in performing this ceremony, but she was also surprised to realize that it was more significant than what we initially anticipated. When we stopped to get a drink at a convenience store after the restaurant, I saw two young women in line. They were just spending an evening together, and there was nothing unusual about them. But seeing them brought me strange shivers, as if the energy of danger was still in the air. Even though Christa was protected, these demonic beings could still hurt someone else tonight. So, having this understanding, Olivia offered to have another ceremony of protection for anyone in this area, for anyone whose Spirits of these lands could extend their energies. It became clear that this was the main reason why Spirits brought us with Olivia today and sent us on this mission.
At the end of the ceremony, we thanked the Spirits and one another for this magical day, full of spiritual initiations. We decided to rest before heading home, and I settled on the blanket, while Emilia and Olivia sat across from me. We couldn’t stop talking about this strange day. We had one realization upon another, and we soon finally discovered that special purpose that Olivia had asked me about. She sensed at our second session that we had met for some higher reason, and now it had become evident what that reason was. Olivia sparkled when she helped others, and now we recognized that her purpose also includes creating protection for sacred temples of sex work. It was a unique skill, desire, and expression of her essence that I haven’t seen in any other soul I worked with. Other souls are usually interested in what I’m interested in, such as writing, healing, and energy work. But with Olivia, it was different. We were guided by her intuition throughout this entire mission, and no other soul that I know could have done it. It was simply natural for her to create spiritual protection for the temple spaces of sex work.
During our evening, we all recognized the importance of this purpose, but Olivia felt most inspired by it. She had been searching for this answer for the last few months, and now it was finally here. Olivia asked me to share my knowledge about the spiritual protection of temples of sexual healing arts from my life as a sexual priestess in ancient Egypt. I explained that such protection is usually created before the foundation of the temple is even laid. The place and location should ideally be found through connection with the Spirits of the land and by asking which Spirits might agree to the building being constructed on their territory. Then, spiritual protection would be created through the use of carved symbols, chants, sounds, and drumming ceremonies during the temple's construction. Upon completion, additional ceremonies would be performed, similar to those we performed today.
Olivia asked me about my perceptions on how the work that we have completed today might manifest. It was evident that we cleansed any negative energies of limited self-perceptions, but it was also important for her to understand what Spirits of the land had created for her temple space. I explained that the highest hope for this work would be a completely different dynamic between providers and clients. Any man who enters the temple space under spiritual protection would be more humble and calm. Any foul play or corrupt desire to hurt or abuse a provider in any way would simply be removed from the space, and no man would dare to act in any destructive way without even realizing that he is being spiritually overpowered by the energies of the lands. Any client would be more cautious about upholding the rules and boundaries of a provider and more open to surrendering to the healing energies that can be created in a session. That was my understanding, and it was the highest aspiration for the work we completed today.
Olivia listened with interest, and I was also incredibly inspired by this conversation. I was aware of the spiritual protection for temple spaces, but for some reason, I never thought I could actually participate in creating it. I suppose I was questioning my spiritual abilities or was simply too preoccupied with all my other commitments, but now that Olivia has brought this to my attention, it has become evident to us that we should continue doing this work with other temple spaces. If we could create protection for her workplace, we believed we could do the same for others. Inspired by this incredible idea, we agreed to continue collaborating in this spiritual work, and that I would always invite Olivia for assistance if I were to conduct similar ceremonies for other temple spaces. She wanted to lead this work and participate in any way possible, so I agreed to her conditions. I was curious about what we would co-create together in this way, and I was glad that we discovered the purpose we had been looking for.
Of course, it was important for us to develop a process for this work. Since that first ceremony, we have performed three others to create protection around two in-call locations and one massage parlor. Each time, we followed the same protocols. After the session, I would ask the soul who invited me to visit her, if she believes that her place of work needs spiritual protection. If the soul consents to this work and agrees to participate in a ceremony, I look for Spirits who protect the land of her workplace. They usually reside in a nearby park or a forest, but in the latest ceremony, it turned out to be the Spirits of the Fraser River, for example. Once I receive confirmation that the Spirits agreed to provide this service, I invite Olivia to conduct the ceremony or participate in it on her terms. I also invite anyone who would like to participate. Obviously, Emilia, guided by her highest purpose on these lands, always assists us in these ceremonies. Then we proceeded with a drumming ceremony that creates protection, typically concluding it with a poem or a meditation.
Olivia, Emilia, and I strongly believe in continuing to develop the ceremonies of spiritual protection, and we plan to conduct more in the future for the highest benefit of all involved. Some of the temple spaces and incalls have a certain level of natural protection from the lands, which could have been created in other ways. But there are definitely more places where such ceremonies could be beneficial. We would like to do more, but for now, we truly feel inspired and blessed to have discovered one of our highest purposes in our connection. We express gratitude to the Spirits of these lands for guiding us to undertake this spiritual work.